I can’t believe I almost forgot to write this story down. Last week was the first time EVER that I wished desperately for a camera phone. Because I just knew that someone, somewhere would appreciate this.
I had just dropped DJ off at school, and I needed to run some errands, so I was waiting for a different bus than usual, which stops right in front of the school. It was colder than the devil’s left nipple out there, too. Which makes this story even more unbelievable.
So I am standing burying myself in my coat, listening to my mp3 player and trying to imagine that I am curled up by a fire with some hot cocoa (or was that with a hot cocoa-colored man? hmmmm….hard decision), when I vaguely hear some people coming up on the sidewalk from behind me. I don’t really think much of it until they passed me. There were 3 women and a small child. The first 2 passed me, one leading the child by the hand. Then the third brings up the rear. And I do mean REAR.
Because this woman was walking by with a MINIMUM of 5 inches of rear and crack all exposed to the horror of everyone’s eyes. I am talking crack for DAYS. I swear I never knew anyone could have such a high, deep asscrack. She had one of those little jackets that girls buy when they want to be cute, not warm. You know, the ones that come barely to their waist. Well, someone forgot to tell her where her waist WAS or something. And they forgot to tell her about the pants, too. I feel bad for her that the friends she was walking with didn’t care enough to tell her how embarrassed the whole rest of the world was for her. As far as I know, the best thing to do when you have gained a little weight is buy some new clothes that actually FIT. Not pretend that your old clothes still fit. Unless she purposely bought those pants and thought she looked awesome. In which case, there is no hope. I CANNOT imagine how this chick couldn’t FEEL her ass hanging out to the bitter cold wind. Unless it was so chapped that you could have poked it with a pin without her feeling anything.
I was almost on the ground rolling watching people in their cars and on the sidewalk do double-takes and then attempt to go on about their business and hide their freaked-out expressions.
So people, before you go outside, remember to hike them damn pants up. And if you can slip a finger in your crack without pulling your pants down, please put on a new pair of pants. For all of our sakes.
I love Boston.

Penned by: Tricia
10 Comments »

The kids had school today. And I sent them. In retrospect this was probably a mistake, since it was snowing. But I desperately needed a break. Actually, I really only sent Gregory. I ended up taking DJ to school, then just staying there for about an hour and a half reading a magazine in the other room so that he could get some energy out, then left with him. We had to go to the store, since in the past 4 days at home they managed to eat about 3/4 of the food and drink ALL of the liquids. Luckily, though, when we got home, Gregory came soon after on his own since even the Boys and Girls Club desided to close. Then we hear that the Superintendent realized he made a mistake allowing the schools to be open. Gee…ya think? So now schools are closed for the rest of the week. And my insanity clause has been clinched. *evil grin*
So now, before tomorrow, I have to somehow think up 837 potrait subjects, invent 17 games, find 11 books to read that the kids haven’t already heard a million times, dig through errant boxes for more art supplies, AND still clean the whole house, since the Section 8 inspector is coming on Friday, and somehow I doubt a little snow will keep them away. Of course, one can hope, but with my luck, I would be all hopeful, then not clean, then have to open the door and be sheepish and mortified. Of course, I still will fail inspection since manintenance STILL never fixed the door to the boys’ room, and with all this snow I highly doubt they will get to it tomorrow.
So, other than that, things are relatively boring here, I know. I feel like my sense of humor and my sense of creativity have both been sucked away by some great cosmic Hoover. Hopefully it’s only because of the weather.

Penned by: Tricia
5 Comments »

Have you ever felt like you honestly just have NOTHING to say? That’s the way I have felt for about the past week or so. I figure if I have nothing of value to contribute, then why bother saying anything at all? There are plenty of vapid, space-filling, brain-numbing blogs out there. Of which I am most likely at the top of the pack, but at least I try to make the effort to not be there intentionally.
Did you know that the Boston Public Schools decided to close for Monday AND Tuesday?? :confused: AND we are supposed to get another 4-8″ or so of snow tomorrow from what I have heard, so Thursday may be a day off as well? I think I have finally broken the insanity barrier. I never realized how annoying it would be to be snowed in in the city. At least in the boonies I could bundle the kids up and throw them outside and watch from the window. Here…there just isn’t anywhere to GO. That I know of yet. I desperately need to find somewhere, though.
Hmmm, what else. Oh! Here is a little gem I found during my forays into one of the boards I frequent.
The American Dream
I found it to be quite a fascinating read, giving some rather good insight into how the rest of the world really views America and WHY, with a comprehensive analysis regarding how the world is slowly swinging on a pendulum away from using the American model as a model to base their own countries on. Very well done.
It has been a pretty lonely long weekend though. not even so much as a phone call from anyone, and everyone I tried to call wasn’t home, and/or didn’t return my call. Only person I didn’t try was Rowz. Hmm…there’s an idea. Anyone else have a number I can call? I have a 3000 minute calling card to burn.

Penned by: Tricia
3 Comments »

Well. What a lovely week. Last weekend was a three-day-weekend, and the kids were like little devils on stilts or something. I was only too glad to escort them out the door on Tuesday.

So on Tuesday I needed to go to the doctor, and while there, I am informed that my blood pressure is 158/118. Nice. So now I am afraid to move in case I stroke out or something worse. They give me some medicine and shoo me out the door, telling me to come back Friday.

Wednesday was ok. Thank goodness for small miracles.

Thursday was almost like entering a newer, more awful dimension. The boys were supposed to have their therapy appointments in the afternoon. No big deal, pretty routine. So I pick up DJ a bit early, and head over to meet Gregory at the bus. The bus comes. And goes. No Gregory. So I figure maybe he just missed the bus, it happens, lately he has been confident enough to walk to the Boys and Girls Club from school, so I figured I would head in there to call the school just in case and wait for him to show up. So I call the school. The first time I get put on hold, then hung up on. The second time I get told rather rudely that “I paged down there and no one answered, so he’s not here.” Nice, that’s helpful. Please note that I specifically asked if he was in detention. That will be important later.

OK, so now it’s about 2:30pm. More than enough time for him to have walked to the Boys and Girls Club. So now I get the first glimmer of worry. Note also that I haven’t been back to my house yet. Instead, I take the bus up the street to see if I can see him walking. No luck. Oh, and while I am doing this, I am seeing about four fire trucks, 2-3 ambulances, police cars, unmarked police cars, a fire communications van, and a helicopter all heading up the street in the same direction I am going. (Turns out there was a fire or something, and no one was hurt badly, thank goodness) This is not the thing you want to be seeing when you do not know where your child is.

So I finally decide I need to go home and make phone calls and decide if I need to call the police. I am pretty much on the verge of a panic attack. Luckily within 5 minutes of us getting home DJ passed out on the couch. I get home, and there is a message waiting. They held Gregory for detention. The message was left at 2:16pm. School gets out at 1:30. W T F???? I had no advance notice of this at all. I have no issue at all with him having detention, in fact, I am sure he probably needs it, but I had sent the teacher a note before that under no circumstances is he to be kept for detention without at least a 24-hour notice. No exceptions. Especially with everything we have already been through this year. I really don’t give a crap what their “policies” are. This is MY child.

So I am STILL left not knowing quite where he is, because at this point all calls to the school go unanswered, not even by an answering machine. Have I mentioned that I despise this school?
So I call the Boys and Girls Club and thank GOODNESS he has just walked in. I ask them to just send him home, because I don’t think I can handle coming back out to get him. He gets home, and his side of the story is that he told the teacher he had an appointment, AND that I would be worried if he didn’t show up, yet he was not allowed to leave the building, nor was he allowed to call me. W T F??? THEN of course, I call on Friday morning and leave TWO messages for the guidance counselor, and do you think he ever bothered to call me back?

OK, Tricia, calm down. Deep breaths. This is why the hell you HAVE high blood pressure, remember? So I go back to the doctor on Friday, and now my blood pressure is like 163/121. Apparently the medication they gave me isn’t working. Excuse me while I have a heart attack. Then they took a bunch of blood and the person who took it is forevermore on my shit list. WHY did he feel the need to dig and dig and GRIND the needle in my arm, then he knocked it half out, and I am watching my blood just drip on down the counter to the floor, while he’s like ‘oops.’ And now it’s only a day later and I have a bruise the size of a half-dollar and it STILL hurts like hell. If he comes near me again with a needle, I will stab him in his eyeball, I swear. On the plus side, though, I found out I have lost 13 pounds in the past 4 months. At least ONE thing I have been working on has shown some fruition.

Oh, and I also pre-registered DJ for Kindergarten. At a SANE school.

Oh, and ONE more thing. I am SO SICK of dealing with immature dickwads that run away instead of talking. And it’s not even like it’s just one person, I seem to attract these people like weeds. CUT THE SHIT, grow up, and be a freaking man already! I already have two sons, I don’t need another one! (Now back to our regularly scheduled blog.)
Is it over yet?

Penned by: Tricia
6 Comments »

Thanks (once again) for your support. I am slowly coming out of this, I think. Or, at least, enough to feel like a functioning human being again. And I feel a rant coming on. Stay tuned.
This is just a random quote from my sidebar that I thought was too good to be allowed to fall into oblivion.

Once a government is committed to the principle of silencing the voice of opposition, it has only one way to go, and that is down the path of increasingly repressive measures, until it becomes a source of terror to all its citizens and creates a country where everyone lives in fear.
Harry S Truman

Penned by: Tricia
4 Comments »

I haven’t felt much like writing. Everything is just…blah. I am not sure how much of the previous feelings are responsible for it, or if it’s just a general malaise caused by the crappy weather. Because the weather has certainly been crappy. Rain, sleet, wind, cold, warm, muggy, brisk, snow. All within the past 5 days. I guess that’s New England for you.
I have also been in a creative slump for so long it’s as if I never had any artisitc ability in me at all. Sure, I did a few layouts, but as far as I can see, they aren’t really creative. Just slapping some things together. I haven’t done a Poser image in over 4 months. And I still don’t even have any desire to. It’s like the IDEAS are there, somewhere below the surface, mocking me, just where I can’t get to them. And there are times when I’m not even sure I WANT to reach them. It doesn’t feel worth the effort.
These are the times when it starts to feel like anything is preferable to this endless pain and misery. Even death.

(more…)

Penned by: Tricia
7 Comments »

I put up a new skin for those of you who may be sick of the raver girlie here. OK, so it’s not a NEW skin, it’s an older one, but it was one of my favorites, so I thought you might like it, too. It’s table-based (eww) but I just don’t have the time now to convert it over to css. I think it still looks ok, though. Enjoy!

So I think this cold has finally decided that I am serious when I say I will kick its ass. I can breathe out of my left nostril again, and I can even sit down without passing out. Yay, me!

I have seen a few people posting lately about what search terms bring people to their site. I don’t generally check that in particular, so I got a bit curious, and here are some tidbits that I discovered that I thought I would share with everyone:

» contemporary torture methods

Okayyyyyy, so good old-fashioned torture techniques aren’t good enough for you? And why look for either one HERE? I mean, I am constantly exploring new torture devices for my boys, but somehow, I don’t think that’s what you had in mind..

» artwork of females being tortured

Umm…get a freaking hobby, assclown. You scare me.

» define self-centered

Ouch. Is someone trying to tell me something?

» sexual abuse while asleep

Dude…if you are asleep, and something like this doesn’t wake you up, back up off of the valium. Seriously. then get the hell off of my site and get some actual help if this is happening to you.

» side effects SiO2 if eaten

Why the heck would you eat Silica?? Your ignorance amuses me.

» sexual increase gemstones

I don’t think gemstones will increase your penis size. I seem to recall a few medications out there that make this claim, though. I’ll tell them you were looking.

» ‘removing obstacles to Happiness & Joy’

Holy crap, if you find the answer to this one, please let me know?

» prison strip during my menstrual period

Err. There aren’t even any words for how strange and twisted this is.

» genital examination fantasies

I can’t say I recall ever fantasizing about having a genital examination. In fact, I usually have to be dragged in kicking and screaming to get one.

» Surragate Sex instruction

A sex surrogate?? Now there are people who are used as sexual substitues?? Whatever happened to Rosy Palm and her 5 friends??

» mastectomy torture

Who are you and why are you on my site, you pervert?

» why am i selfish towards my boyfriend

Why do you feel the need to ask this question of a search engine?

» pussy ejection

There have been a few times when I wished mine was equipped with an ejection seat.

» may pusy

I don’t know about any of you, but my pussy tends to stick around all year, not only in May. Any of you ladies have a May pussy??

» pussy substitutes

Sorry…there ARE no substitues.

» The most frightening journey I had ever had

Oh good, you made it! Are your bags packed and ready to go?

Penned by: Tricia
8 Comments »

To answer the question raised, no, that post down there is not a work of fiction. more’s the pity. Thank you for your support.

I. HATE. Liars.

What the hell is it that makes a person pretend to be something they are not on the internet?? OK, yeah, whatever, I know all about the whole fantasy crap or whatever. But I am talking about willfully deceiving someone, making them believe you are something you are not, then being truly surprised when your ass is caught out.

Yes, I have become a victim of this behavior today. I know you are saying “w t f, Tricia, you’ve been on the internet for 8 years. do you not know by now to not let yourself get too caught up with someone?” Yes. I know. But in that 8 years I have never had a serious friendship or anything else with someone that lied on that caliber. Just lucky, I guess. I mean, not everyone I have met has been GREAT, but at least they were honest about it. Is it SO wrong that I try to give people the benefit of the doubt? Not at first. But after days of wonderful conversations and laughter and sharing, and really feeling a genuine connection, how else am I supposed to take something? Then when I find out, you come up with some shit like you didn’t know I was going to turn out to be so great, and you forgot you sent me a bogus pic at first??? Am I REALLY that lonely and desperate that I am going to start falling for this type of bullshit??? Hell no.

I am who I am, I am not capable of being someone else, even for show. I have never sent anyone a fake picture of me. It wouldn’t even occur to me. If you don’t like me, you just don’t. How much MORE would you not like me if things progressed and you started thinking something was there, then found out I sent you some fake pic and that I don’t look anything like that? And no, it’s not about looks at ALL. If you are going to lie about something as big as that, what ELSE are you lying about? What other deceits have you practiced upon me that I in my naivetee have accepted as truth, while for all I know you are behind your monitor laughing your ass off at how easily I am playing into your hands. Well, you got caught, and now everyone can laugh at YOU. Fuck you.

You know, after I found this out today, I just started bawling. The whole time I am thinking to myself, “What the HELL am I crying for? I don’t even know this guy.” Then it hit me. It wasn’t about this new person at all. It was about HIM. It’s ALWAYS about HIM. No matter how much bravado I slung around in the Cookie Man post, it was all just a bunch of crap. For better or worse, my heart has been given away, and it refuses to be taken back. And there are no magic answers to that conundrum. And what’s worse, I, in my selfish need to find an answer to my OWN issues, hurt HIM in the process, and made myself look like a selfish ass. Way to go.

You know what, I think I will keep my unrequited love. If that means I will be alone for the rest of my life, so be it. At least it’s the kind of bullshit I KNOW. NEW bullshit is not worth the time it takes to type the words KISS MY ASS.

Penned by: Tricia
13 Comments »

…for Breast Cancer awareness by leaving a comment over there:
California Hammonds
(Greg’s site is also a truly wonderful one, so spend some time looking around after you comment!)

Penned by: Tricia
3 Comments »

You Are a Retrospective Soul

The most misunderstood of all the soul signs. Sometimes you even have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are. You are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life. You’re best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor. Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily. But if you aren’t careful, you’ll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes. For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present. You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life. Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul

Wow. For an internet test, that’s kind of eerily accurate.

Penned by: Tricia
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