*sigh* It is really hard to write this right now. This will probably be my last post for quite some time. The children and I are moving, maybe tomorrow, definitely by Friday. And the place we are going for the next few months will not have any type of internet access, and I have no idea if there is a library within walking distance. So, I will bid you all adieu, until we meet again. If I was unable to personally say goodbye to any of you, I sincerely apologize. I will miss ALL of you SO much, and I hope that now and again you stop by and leave me a little note or something, so that when I get a chance to get my e-mail, I will be able to smile a bit. If any of you have my attbi address, I will be deleting that one, but my MM.net address will still be valid, or you can also reach me here, but since I cannot guarantee that I will be able to check my mail at all for a month or so, if you use the hotmail one, please forgive me if I do not receive your message. I love you guys, and I will be back when I can. :kissy:
So, all that sad crap said, on with the next deadly sin. I hope I remember which one is next the next time I can post.
Right now I am angry. So angry that there are times I wish I was allowed the freedom to punch a hole through the wall. Beat my head against it. Punch someone ELSE in the face. HARD. And I am afraid of that anger. Because I don’t feel as though I have any place to put it. And I think that might be the key. Anger is a healthy emotion, but it needs to have an outlet. It needs to be released somehow. And if it is released regularly in a proper way, such as by boxing or lifting weights or other physical activity, or by creativity, or by talking it out, then it never reaches such a toxic level as to get us into trouble. We never need to reach that level where we are capable of hurting ourselves or someone else just to get some release from these feelings.
People today are at highly toxic levels of anger. Ever-increasing numbers of tales of road rage, school shootings, hate crimes, domestic violence, child abuse, and other senseless acts of horror are very telling symptoms of this. We live in a rush-rush no-time-for-you kind of society, where we seem to almost be encouraged to forget about our neighbors, to disregard them because they are probably out to get us too. And the government’s response of adding more and more laws is in no way curbing the flow, in fact, it is only creating more anger as people chafe under the rope of their lost freedoms.
I really don’t have any answers for this disheartening trend. Hell, I can’t even stem my own anger right now. Anger is frightening. Anger can feel overpowering. Letting your anger out in unhealthy ways can feel powerful…for a moment. Almost like a drug. You need to feel that power more and more in order for it to give you the same satisfaction. And in the meantime, people around you suffer because of it. I think it just really takes each person taking responsibility for themselves. And we can only start the process one person at a time. Stop letting television raise our kids. Talk to each other. Stop holding everything in. You don’t have to be all big and bad and proud. Be angry. Embrace it. And then let it go. Because life is way too short to walk through it in a red-tinged haze. I’d rather wear my rose-tinted glasses.